Before I go to sleep I want to mention that I do my best to avoid actual rants on this blog. I do tend to rant in real life with a great deal of passion, such as why all children under 6 should be stuffed in pet carriers and thrown into the cargohold of an airplane (far away from the cats and dogs, mind you, so the animals don't have to listen to squealing babies). I can rant about how much I hate awards shows, how many calories it takes to flick on a turn signal in your car, or how people who dislike cats are probably aligned with the forces of evil. But online, I show great restraint.
However, I was one impulse away from writing a scathing blog about people who are too stupid to use the self check out lanes in the grocery store. It should be a privilege for those of us with enough savvy to actually operate the machines; perhaps a retina scan could identify, for example, the woman in front of me who could not figure out how to enter a produce code on the machine (by pressing the "enter produce code" button). If she again approached the self-checkout, it would detect her and simply turn off and tell her to go to a cashier. The same goes for the guy who brings 118 items into the self checkout lane.
Granted, these people are still not as bad as that enemy of efficiency, the micro-time murderer that is the person who writes a check in the express lane-- and always forgets their ID (their quote every time: I never have to show my license anywhere else!?)
So, I refrain from ranting because I need to be dreaming of puppies and kittens when I go to bed, not how hard I could kick the idiot in front of me at airline security screening who can't figure out that keys, coins, chains, watches and over sized novelty belt buckles in the shape of Texas are made from metal.











