The more I learned, the more smoke filled my house. Now, poor Xanadu and I are toughing it out with all the windows open. This is why cold cereal is the best choice for breakfast, especially amongst sluggish non-morning person folks like myself.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
I'm sad to announce that Boris Pickett has passed away, joining the ghoulish realm he so eloquently described in the b-movie monster themed Monster Mash. It was in fact a graveyard smash. His vocals in the 1962 one-hit wonder remain a staple of Halloween rock everywhere. May he mash in peace.
Speaking about monsters, here's a little fun with the ultimate evil to walk upon the earth. Cats that look like Hitler is exactly what you'd expect it to be. Whether they are annexing the nearest litter box or ranting at the inadequacy of last night's can of Fancy Feast, these felines are simulacrums of history's most despised dictator. And most of 'em are darn cute!!
Speaking about monsters, here's a little fun with the ultimate evil to walk upon the earth. Cats that look like Hitler is exactly what you'd expect it to be. Whether they are annexing the nearest litter box or ranting at the inadequacy of last night's can of Fancy Feast, these felines are simulacrums of history's most despised dictator. And most of 'em are darn cute!!
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
The latest work trip I have is confirmed for Trinidad and Tobago, yet another Caribbean destination (mountain biking this time around)! It should be a blast and the best part is I'll reclaim the Dziezynski family's "Farthest South" title (my Mom and sister have been to Aruba, I've only been as far as St. Lucia). I don't know too much about the country other than it's supposed to be beautiful and is one of the more industrialized countries in the Caribbean. Oh, and the locals are called Trinis, not Toboggans.
I'll be out there May 20-26th just in time to celebrate Victoria Day (May 24th)! Do you know where these lyrics are from:
Everyone would gather on the 24th of May
Sitting in the sand to watch the fireworks display
Winner gets a free jpg of Fudgie the whale!
I'll be out there May 20-26th just in time to celebrate Victoria Day (May 24th)! Do you know where these lyrics are from:
Everyone would gather on the 24th of May
Sitting in the sand to watch the fireworks display
Winner gets a free jpg of Fudgie the whale!
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Big congrats to Doug and Radha on the birth of their son Kieran on April 18th! Of course I don't want to hold him, but it's awesome nonetheless!! For more info check out Doug's blog.
And as I said to Doug, the lad has great initials-- KJS--perfect for when he gets the high score on Donkey Kong. Sweet!
And as I said to Doug, the lad has great initials-- KJS--perfect for when he gets the high score on Donkey Kong. Sweet!
One of the poems I wrote o so long ago was called Motions of Midnight. I always valued it as one of the first pieces of writing that transcended the trivial (though necessary) musings of youth. So many times I've seen those digits on the clock begin a new day, a new moment to change or be changed. To put it less poetically, it reminds me of being on a baseball fields hours before the game, knowing a whole set of circumstances will soon play out here and after the fact, I'll again be in the same place--but changed from the experience.
Where my mind wanders this late is often a pensive place, most likely with the filters of worry dissolved in a sleepy haze. Sometimes I worry about strange things: the fate of the polar bear cubs I saw in the Arctic, a mountain goat seen on a remote ridge, the bird who plucked a writhing worm from the ground this morning. Then I ponder my friends and family, if they sleep well...if their motions of midnight are calm or like me, do they remain awake long after many of the natural guardians of reasonable thought have fallen dormant?
As myriads of thoughts seep in, I look at my little friend Xanadu peacefully dozing on a coat of mine I leave on the bed for her. There, in her little 8 lb feline body I find an ocean of tranquility, as if she has mastered things both primal and elaborate in her animal's heart and indulged in the beauty of sleep. Soon, I'll crawl into bed next to her and hope to assimilate myself somehow. The mastery of one's life is so simple when seen in a cat--a warm sunbeam, fresh air, a good meal and sleep comes like a blessing.
I'm getting closer every night, but still--as the clock continues to bring forth a new day in the cover of darkest night, peace remains a bad transmission that Xanadu is receiving crystal clear. At least she's a good role model though; concrete evidence not every midnight needs to be a waking one.
Where my mind wanders this late is often a pensive place, most likely with the filters of worry dissolved in a sleepy haze. Sometimes I worry about strange things: the fate of the polar bear cubs I saw in the Arctic, a mountain goat seen on a remote ridge, the bird who plucked a writhing worm from the ground this morning. Then I ponder my friends and family, if they sleep well...if their motions of midnight are calm or like me, do they remain awake long after many of the natural guardians of reasonable thought have fallen dormant?
As myriads of thoughts seep in, I look at my little friend Xanadu peacefully dozing on a coat of mine I leave on the bed for her. There, in her little 8 lb feline body I find an ocean of tranquility, as if she has mastered things both primal and elaborate in her animal's heart and indulged in the beauty of sleep. Soon, I'll crawl into bed next to her and hope to assimilate myself somehow. The mastery of one's life is so simple when seen in a cat--a warm sunbeam, fresh air, a good meal and sleep comes like a blessing.
I'm getting closer every night, but still--as the clock continues to bring forth a new day in the cover of darkest night, peace remains a bad transmission that Xanadu is receiving crystal clear. At least she's a good role model though; concrete evidence not every midnight needs to be a waking one.
Friday, April 20, 2007
As many, many of you already know, I've been on a quest to find a Fudgie the Whale Carvel Icre Cream Cake for the better part of 9 years now. Despite claims on the Carvel website and store owners that Fudgie still exists, I've had no luck in locating the delicious cetacean. Well, this morning there's a major breakthrough! Thanks to Mom for sending the image! Check out this ad: (click for a bigger version):
If this is accurate, not only is the existence of a modern-day Fudgie verified but it's his birthday party next week! Looking at the font on the Carvel cups and the hi-tech, CGI Fudgie, I think my long quest may soon be at an end! Some of you may remember my Fudgie posts on my OLD blog, which I canned in 2003 or so or prehaps my rantings of wanting a Fudgie after highpoints hikes in the late 90's. This is gonna be sweet!
I think my "Seattle Incident" gives me hope; it was in a market in downtown Seattle that I found my long-sought box of Alexander the Grapes (now known as Grapeheads). It was around the same time my Fudgie frustrations began that the Alexander the Grape mystery started. I'm 1 for 2 so far and I feel strongly that a slice of Fudgie may be in my future very soon, giving me a 100% success rate on re-discovering the treats of the past.
If this is accurate, not only is the existence of a modern-day Fudgie verified but it's his birthday party next week! Looking at the font on the Carvel cups and the hi-tech, CGI Fudgie, I think my long quest may soon be at an end! Some of you may remember my Fudgie posts on my OLD blog, which I canned in 2003 or so or prehaps my rantings of wanting a Fudgie after highpoints hikes in the late 90's. This is gonna be sweet!
I think my "Seattle Incident" gives me hope; it was in a market in downtown Seattle that I found my long-sought box of Alexander the Grapes (now known as Grapeheads). It was around the same time my Fudgie frustrations began that the Alexander the Grape mystery started. I'm 1 for 2 so far and I feel strongly that a slice of Fudgie may be in my future very soon, giving me a 100% success rate on re-discovering the treats of the past.
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
I got to watch the last part of The Never Ending Story this morning and I STILL have issues with the climactic moment where Atrayu (however you spell it) yells out the girl's name. I think the script goes something like this:
Girl: Say it, Atrayu, say my name!! Please!
Atrayu: I will say it! I'll say your name!! *unintelligible*
To this day, I still don't know what he says or why he says it. Maybe it's not really that important. Maybe he actually named her "Indecepherable scream". One thing is for sure--those oracles make lousy guards. All you have to do is run fast enough? Heck, I'd recruit Natrone Means for that mission!
Rule 1 of life: women are not men. No where is this more apparent than when a baby makes their appearance in a room of otherwise normal human adults. Instantly, women are drawn into the little bundle of joy, mesmerized by the miracle of life still naive to pain, unfettered by fear and new to the world. Men, however, instantly look for something--ANYTHING--to do to avoid having to confront the smelly, puffy, ur-mammal writhing about and expelling assorted creamy fluids from random orefices. Broken toliets, car oil that needs changing, bathtub caulking, roof shingle replacement, shoelace repairs, polishing the mailbox--you name it, any excuse to escape man-to-baby interaction becomes urgent mission number 1.
Ladies, let's make one thing clear--that poster of the oddly hairless dreamy hunk with bulging biceps cuddling the newborn is a staged shot, most likely manipulated with photoshop. The original dude was probably holding a football, which he gazed at lovingly, or perhaps a spiral cut ham. Forcing a man to hold a baby is like forcing a woman to hold a Playstation controller--they'll do it, but the awkwardness is crystal clear.
So, to avoid any confusion when all those buns pop our of their respective ovens, I present to you 5 Rules for new parents: How to deal with your baby and your guy friends:
Rule #1: Your baby is ugly.
Don't take it personally, all babies are ugly. From the fatty, twisted, pink face to the stubby bulbous fingers, from the spotty thin hair to the toothless maw crusted with discharge, human babies are right on par with newborn birds for visual appeal. In fact, it takes 4 or 5 years for humans to morph into something more pleasing to the eye and even then, random teeth and bad haircuts can prolong the period of awkwardness. Don't ask us if your baby is cute unless you want an honest answer (no, he/she is not). In fact, that is a question to ONLY ask to women, since they will always say yes, even if your baby looks like a misshapen fraggle. The best approach is to say, "Here is our baby" and leave it at that. Oh, and do not be offended when we cannot tell what gender your baby is, even if you put a darling bow on its head.
Rule #2: Your baby smells awful
Ah, if only little Johnny spit-up was a new car, he may have a distinct odor that would form a lasting bond in our scent memory. Alas, new baby smell is something like Chinese leftovers at best, manure based compost piles at worst. A thin veil of powder does nothing to hide the plasticy, vaguely hotdog-esque odor of new babies. Though it seems obvious, never ask anyone to smell your baby (unless they are a woman).
Rule #3: Do not make a man hold your baby.
This is an incredibly awkward moment for all involved. Never mind forcing someone to hold a hefty, uncoordinated, stinky human--men have no idea how to naturally do it. The more skilled males may attempt to hold them like a cat (by the scruff of the neck?) or say, like a serving platter. And it's no picnic for the baby either--the lunch buffet is gone for starters--remember, men's nipples are purely decorative--and much like animals, they can sense nervousness in their "handler", ensuring a full diaper load of fear to come forth. Just hold onto your baby or hand it off to a woman (strange as it may seem, women actually LIKE holding babies).
Rule #4: Do not put us on the phone with your baby.
Cell phone minutes aren't free! The last thing we need is two minutes of gibbrish to waste our time "talking" to a baby. And, if we actually are forced to communicate with the infant, the best we can manage is a creepy baby-voice that sounds like the effeminate puppet of any given old time morning kids show. If you must put your child on the horn, let them garble at a telemarketer.
Rule #5: One picture is more than enough, thanks!
Guys don't show you pictures of every down of a football game so there's no reason to force us to endure 786 pictures of the little stinker doing things ALL babies do. In fact, if the baby is there in the room there's no reason to show any pictures at all. Rememeber, rule 1-- all babies are ugly-- so you could actually show us pictures of 97 different babies and they'd all look generally the same. Keep one in your wallet and only present it when asked.
See, that shouldn't be hard right? Much like a dog that bosterously thrusts his nose into your guests unsuspecting crotches, you need to be aware that handing a baby to a man is a classic faux-pas. In a pinch, the San Diego Chicken can watch your baby (as seen above) while your adult friends and you partake in bowling or a conversation that lasts more than 43 seconds without interruption. A little foresight and all will be well, assuming the chicken doesn't actually eat your baby.
Thanks to everybody who sent along good birthday wishes! I had a wonderful time out at Beaver Creek with Sheila (and later met up with Paul Retrum). The snow was slushified, but it was still a blast to be out on a perfect spring day! Our large ursine friend here was at the top of the lifts at Beaver Creek, watching over the land until he melts away. There are a few more pictures from the day here (and check out the cute double pony tails on Sheila!)
After a tough day on the legs on the snowboard, Sunday was a double-header frisbee fest for which I was surprisingly nimble. Maybe I'm getting more fit in my old age, eh? I'm not even sore today, but then again I haven't done much more than gotten out of bed to pet Xanadu and sit in front of the compy.
I'm hoping 31 is going to be a good year. 30 was a strange, strange trip and most of the experience was writing and hiking for my book. I like the way 31 looks in print though, so that's a good sign!
Girl: Say it, Atrayu, say my name!! Please!
Atrayu: I will say it! I'll say your name!! *unintelligible*
To this day, I still don't know what he says or why he says it. Maybe it's not really that important. Maybe he actually named her "Indecepherable scream". One thing is for sure--those oracles make lousy guards. All you have to do is run fast enough? Heck, I'd recruit Natrone Means for that mission!
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Rule 1 of life: women are not men. No where is this more apparent than when a baby makes their appearance in a room of otherwise normal human adults. Instantly, women are drawn into the little bundle of joy, mesmerized by the miracle of life still naive to pain, unfettered by fear and new to the world. Men, however, instantly look for something--ANYTHING--to do to avoid having to confront the smelly, puffy, ur-mammal writhing about and expelling assorted creamy fluids from random orefices. Broken toliets, car oil that needs changing, bathtub caulking, roof shingle replacement, shoelace repairs, polishing the mailbox--you name it, any excuse to escape man-to-baby interaction becomes urgent mission number 1. Ladies, let's make one thing clear--that poster of the oddly hairless dreamy hunk with bulging biceps cuddling the newborn is a staged shot, most likely manipulated with photoshop. The original dude was probably holding a football, which he gazed at lovingly, or perhaps a spiral cut ham. Forcing a man to hold a baby is like forcing a woman to hold a Playstation controller--they'll do it, but the awkwardness is crystal clear.
So, to avoid any confusion when all those buns pop our of their respective ovens, I present to you 5 Rules for new parents: How to deal with your baby and your guy friends:
Rule #1: Your baby is ugly.
Don't take it personally, all babies are ugly. From the fatty, twisted, pink face to the stubby bulbous fingers, from the spotty thin hair to the toothless maw crusted with discharge, human babies are right on par with newborn birds for visual appeal. In fact, it takes 4 or 5 years for humans to morph into something more pleasing to the eye and even then, random teeth and bad haircuts can prolong the period of awkwardness. Don't ask us if your baby is cute unless you want an honest answer (no, he/she is not). In fact, that is a question to ONLY ask to women, since they will always say yes, even if your baby looks like a misshapen fraggle. The best approach is to say, "Here is our baby" and leave it at that. Oh, and do not be offended when we cannot tell what gender your baby is, even if you put a darling bow on its head.
Rule #2: Your baby smells awful
Ah, if only little Johnny spit-up was a new car, he may have a distinct odor that would form a lasting bond in our scent memory. Alas, new baby smell is something like Chinese leftovers at best, manure based compost piles at worst. A thin veil of powder does nothing to hide the plasticy, vaguely hotdog-esque odor of new babies. Though it seems obvious, never ask anyone to smell your baby (unless they are a woman).
Rule #3: Do not make a man hold your baby.
This is an incredibly awkward moment for all involved. Never mind forcing someone to hold a hefty, uncoordinated, stinky human--men have no idea how to naturally do it. The more skilled males may attempt to hold them like a cat (by the scruff of the neck?) or say, like a serving platter. And it's no picnic for the baby either--the lunch buffet is gone for starters--remember, men's nipples are purely decorative--and much like animals, they can sense nervousness in their "handler", ensuring a full diaper load of fear to come forth. Just hold onto your baby or hand it off to a woman (strange as it may seem, women actually LIKE holding babies).
Rule #4: Do not put us on the phone with your baby.
Cell phone minutes aren't free! The last thing we need is two minutes of gibbrish to waste our time "talking" to a baby. And, if we actually are forced to communicate with the infant, the best we can manage is a creepy baby-voice that sounds like the effeminate puppet of any given old time morning kids show. If you must put your child on the horn, let them garble at a telemarketer.
Rule #5: One picture is more than enough, thanks!
Guys don't show you pictures of every down of a football game so there's no reason to force us to endure 786 pictures of the little stinker doing things ALL babies do. In fact, if the baby is there in the room there's no reason to show any pictures at all. Rememeber, rule 1-- all babies are ugly-- so you could actually show us pictures of 97 different babies and they'd all look generally the same. Keep one in your wallet and only present it when asked.
See, that shouldn't be hard right? Much like a dog that bosterously thrusts his nose into your guests unsuspecting crotches, you need to be aware that handing a baby to a man is a classic faux-pas. In a pinch, the San Diego Chicken can watch your baby (as seen above) while your adult friends and you partake in bowling or a conversation that lasts more than 43 seconds without interruption. A little foresight and all will be well, assuming the chicken doesn't actually eat your baby.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Thanks to everybody who sent along good birthday wishes! I had a wonderful time out at Beaver Creek with Sheila (and later met up with Paul Retrum). The snow was slushified, but it was still a blast to be out on a perfect spring day! Our large ursine friend here was at the top of the lifts at Beaver Creek, watching over the land until he melts away. There are a few more pictures from the day here (and check out the cute double pony tails on Sheila!)
After a tough day on the legs on the snowboard, Sunday was a double-header frisbee fest for which I was surprisingly nimble. Maybe I'm getting more fit in my old age, eh? I'm not even sore today, but then again I haven't done much more than gotten out of bed to pet Xanadu and sit in front of the compy.
I'm hoping 31 is going to be a good year. 30 was a strange, strange trip and most of the experience was writing and hiking for my book. I like the way 31 looks in print though, so that's a good sign!
Thursday, April 12, 2007
*WHEW!* What a busy week it's been! I finished the final round of my maps for my book, which is the first "officially" done section. The manuscript gets one more look over, the intro and back covers need to be written and the photo galleries finalized and voila, it'll be done! I can thank the 600 lbs of delicious candy from Thora (see previous post) for keeping me awake, alert and sugared up. I wisely brought the bounty to my office to share, otherwise I'd be in a state of perpetual alertness for upwards of 200 straight hours.
It looks like Colorado is getting yet MORE snow, which makes snowboarding on my birthday this Saturday a no brainer. It also makes snowboarding on my sister's birthday tomorrow a half-brainer (I still have taxes looming...ughhhh).
Finally, the new web site is being pieced together nicely and I'll start adding content soon! Look for weekly updates there (and of course your more steady blog updates!) And don't forget to wish my sister a happy birthday tomorrow!
A huge thanks to my friend Thora who sent me a king's ransom of candy from Iceland for my birthday! Xanadu and I effectively block out all the cool varieties of treats she sent, but as you can tell I have my toothbrush ready to go! I've already tried a bunch of them and to my delight, a lot have black licorice in them. If you're in the neighborhood and want to sample candy from the land of ice and snow, don't be shy--I can't possibly eat this all!
In other news, my new site design is done (but the links aren't up, only a few). You can check out the site here. Comments are welcome! I originally was going to make it a pure flash site, but those can be tough to update so I deflashed it. For those nerds who care, the font in the title banner is from Neil Peart's "Ghost Rider" book and the rest of the Greek looking text is lifted from Rush's new Snakes and Ladders CD/DVD due out May 1st!
I hope everyone had a happy Easter and avoided peep overload! As for me, I have enough candy to caffeinate me for a week's worth of work! Oh and taxes too! Bring it on!
4 minutes 38 seconds in Photoshop. Could be better but I have stuff to do :)
It looks like Colorado is getting yet MORE snow, which makes snowboarding on my birthday this Saturday a no brainer. It also makes snowboarding on my sister's birthday tomorrow a half-brainer (I still have taxes looming...ughhhh).
Finally, the new web site is being pieced together nicely and I'll start adding content soon! Look for weekly updates there (and of course your more steady blog updates!) And don't forget to wish my sister a happy birthday tomorrow!
Monday, April 09, 2007
A huge thanks to my friend Thora who sent me a king's ransom of candy from Iceland for my birthday! Xanadu and I effectively block out all the cool varieties of treats she sent, but as you can tell I have my toothbrush ready to go! I've already tried a bunch of them and to my delight, a lot have black licorice in them. If you're in the neighborhood and want to sample candy from the land of ice and snow, don't be shy--I can't possibly eat this all!
In other news, my new site design is done (but the links aren't up, only a few). You can check out the site here. Comments are welcome! I originally was going to make it a pure flash site, but those can be tough to update so I deflashed it. For those nerds who care, the font in the title banner is from Neil Peart's "Ghost Rider" book and the rest of the Greek looking text is lifted from Rush's new Snakes and Ladders CD/DVD due out May 1st!
I hope everyone had a happy Easter and avoided peep overload! As for me, I have enough candy to caffeinate me for a week's worth of work! Oh and taxes too! Bring it on!
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
4 minutes 38 seconds in Photoshop. Could be better but I have stuff to do :)
Monday, April 02, 2007
Woot, www.mountainouswords.com is up thanks to Kevin B! Right now, all you'll get is a creepy picture of Sinistar but yes, Jamesfaqs is migrating over to the new site with lots of new stuff. Also, thanks to Lisa A. for pointing me to Da Fonts for some mountainy lettering.
This weekend was good times, I got to see the stars on a night hike and take a road ride up to Jamestown with Marie and her friends. Today has been unusually productive, so all is well for now!
Paul Bartok has gotten me psyched about a possible high points trip to Cali and Nevada, I hope we can make it happen! I'm stuck at 35 highpoints now, I'd like to have 40 by year's end. Maybe more! Time to nip it in the bud and get me to Alaska, where da' moose run free.
Also, musk ox rule :)
This weekend was good times, I got to see the stars on a night hike and take a road ride up to Jamestown with Marie and her friends. Today has been unusually productive, so all is well for now!
Paul Bartok has gotten me psyched about a possible high points trip to Cali and Nevada, I hope we can make it happen! I'm stuck at 35 highpoints now, I'd like to have 40 by year's end. Maybe more! Time to nip it in the bud and get me to Alaska, where da' moose run free.
Also, musk ox rule :)
